1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.
  2. Discuss politics - join our community by registering for free here! HOP - the political discussion forum

New element discovered

Discussion in 'Political Humor' started by Federal Farmer, Jun 14, 2008.

  1. Federal Farmer

    Federal Farmer New Member

    Joined:
    Jun 9, 2008
    Messages:
    922
    Likes Received:
    3
    Trophy Points:
    0
    DEMOCRATIUM
    New element added to Periodic Chart

    Research has led to the discovery of the heaviest element yet known to science. The new element, Democratium (Dm), has one neuron, 25 assistant neurons, 88 deputy neurons and 198 assistant deputy neurons, giving it an atomic mass of 312.

    These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons. Since Democratium has no electrons, it is inert; however, it can be detected, because it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact.

    A minute amount of Democratium can cause a reaction, that would normally take less than a second, to take from four days to four years to complete.

    Democratium has a normal half-life of 2-6 years; it does not decay but instead undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of the assistant neurons and deputy neurons, exchange places.

    In fact, Democratium's mass will actually increase over time, since each reorganization will cause more morons to become neurons, forming isodopes.

    This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists to believe that Democratium is formed whenever morons reach a critical concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as critical morass.

    When catalyzed with sufficient money, Democratium becomes Administratium, an element that radiates just as much energy as Democratium since it has half as many peons but twice as many morons.
     
  2. GenSeneca

    GenSeneca Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jun 8, 2008
    Messages:
    6,245
    Likes Received:
    501
    Trophy Points:
    83
    Location:
    ={CaLiCo}= HQ
    Thats great! Is that your own work??
     
  3. Federal Farmer

    Federal Farmer New Member

    Joined:
    Jun 9, 2008
    Messages:
    922
    Likes Received:
    3
    Trophy Points:
    0
    Nope, I stole it fair and square. It's been around in various incarnations for years, I just made some minor modifications to bring it up to date.
     
  4. GenSeneca

    GenSeneca Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jun 8, 2008
    Messages:
    6,245
    Likes Received:
    501
    Trophy Points:
    83
    Location:
    ={CaLiCo}= HQ
    Here are a couple pieces of satire that I wrote and have posted on another site:

    Seneca's Satire:

    Carbon Offsets

    Seneca's Interview with Osama Bin Laden

    I hope you like them! That site has a private forum for politics that the public and regular Forum members don't see, its a great deal like this place as far as the civility of discussions. I should know, I helped create it. :cool:
     
  5. top gun

    top gun New Member

    Joined:
    May 15, 2007
    Messages:
    4,940
    Likes Received:
    34
    Trophy Points:
    0
    Location:
    Ohio, USA
    But have you heard about the REALLY BIG new discovery in the world of medicine!!! It recently has been found manifesting itself in some varying but highly related strains.

    ELEPHANTITIS:

    examples...

    The uncontrollable longing to meet strange men in airport restrooms and participate in gay stall intercourse.

    The addiction to solicit young male Congressional Pages for some male on male behavior.

    video documentation:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bcts9ywCv9g

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SH8pLD0aRBI
     
  6. Pandora

    Pandora Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Apr 6, 2008
    Messages:
    11,790
    Likes Received:
    257
    Trophy Points:
    83
    Location:
    The people's republic of Eugene

    OH but they found the cause. It is called Closet Democratitis. They just need to admit the fact they have democratitis and they are cured, well cured is not exactly the word but at least what they do becomes acceptable :D
     
  7. Federal Farmer

    Federal Farmer New Member

    Joined:
    Jun 9, 2008
    Messages:
    922
    Likes Received:
    3
    Trophy Points:
    0


    It would appear that there is a penchant for Democrats to suffer from Elephantitis more so than Republicans, as is evidenced by Gary Studds, Barney Franks, and most of the Democrat representatives from San Francisco.
     
  8. Pandora

    Pandora Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Apr 6, 2008
    Messages:
    11,790
    Likes Received:
    257
    Trophy Points:
    83
    Location:
    The people's republic of Eugene
    He did not remember them because when you accept the democratitis solution then the problem is ignored.
     
  9. Libsmasher

    Libsmasher New Member

    Joined:
    Jan 9, 2008
    Messages:
    3,151
    Likes Received:
    16
    Trophy Points:
    0
    If you crack Democratium, you get Obamium and a bunch of free radicals. :)
     
Loading...

Share This Page