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Osama Diaries

Discussion in 'Political Humor' started by Gipper, May 13, 2011.

  1. Gipper

    Gipper Well-Known Member

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    Dear Diary,
    So sad today. Martyrdom can be very lonely thing. Hiding out in a massive complex with just the bare minimal number of satellite channels and only a few wives while all your friends are getting blown up by American bombs is some times too much to bear. Sorry. Got to go. Abduhl just found repeats of Everyone Loves the Raymond!

    Dear Diary,
    Each day I realize that Islam is the religion of peace. If I could only kill all the people who don’t share this opinion. Here’s hoping.

    Dear Diary,
    Al-Zawarhi is on Fox. He’s so dreamy. That thick beard and those little glasses. He looks so intellectual. I think I have a little man-crush going on! lol.

    Dear Diary,
    It seems like everywhere Islam goes there is conflict. Israel. Kashmir. Iran. Indonesia. And Africa? Forget about Africa! Everyone is hating on us there. Why is it? Why do all cultures seem to fight against us? If I wasn’t so theologically correct in the teachings of Mohammed, praise him, I would speculate that we’re the aggressors. I just made myself laugh so hard I spit espresso on my journal.

    Dear Diary,
    Good news! I am receiving help from my friends in the… Pakistan… I mean Kapistani… government and intelligence agencies. Time to get my jihad on.

    Dear Diary,
    Found new website today – IHateTheMedia.com. Started posting as Jameela. Still waiting for free Obama phone

    Dear Diary,
    Met with wife number five and boy is she pissed. Seems she now has nasty camel rash. My bad.

    Dear Diary,
    Started using new beard dye. Local farmers not happy about stains on their goats. To them I say, build taller fence!

    Dear Diary,
    Really enjoyed the Royal Wedding. So romantic. That Pippa is something, isn’t she? She’s, like 27, though. A little too long in the tooth for me. Also, she is not a goat.

    Dear Diary,
    Q: Why were my last three posts about bestiality? A: Have you seen wives 2 through 5?
     
  2. pocketfullofshells

    pocketfullofshells Well-Known Member

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    land of 10,000 lakes and 2 senators again
    you know normaly when you copy past something like that you should mention where you got it, or something....lucky for them them plugged themself in the middle of it :)
     
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