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Political satire: A biting cold war

Discussion in 'Political Humor' started by reedak, Jan 1, 2015.

  1. reedak

    reedak Member

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    Mr A kept a ferocious dog to guard his orchard from encroachment by Mr B, whose orchard was separated from Mr A's by a stream. One day, Mr A's dog crossed over the tiny stream to attack his neighbour's dog of the same species. Seeing that his pet was seriously bitten in the attack, Mr B came to its aid by biting the ferocious dog. In return, Mr A rushed to bite Mr B. In the end, both men were so exhausted from biting each other that they lay beside each other, unable to move their bloody hands and legs. Similarly, the two dogs were so seriously bitten in the fighting that they ended up lying motionless beside each other.

    After some time, both men found the energy to stand up and carry their badly wounded pets home. Since then, there were no more biting wars between the two neighbours. Mr A detested his pet as it became more untamable than a wolf day by day. It grew more and more ferocious as it barked at Mr B and his dog every day. He had no choice but to bear with the nuisance caused by his ferocious dog because he was more distrustful and afraid of Mr B who was well-known for his encroachment on other people's lands.

    Mr A could no longer stand his pet's nuisance. One morning, he tried to put a leash over its neck, but the dog caught hold of one end of the leash with its teeth and dragged him, who was holding the other end of the leash, along the ground for some distance. Mr B, who was watching from the opposite bank, laughed out loudly: "What a funny scene! Instead of the man walking the dog, the dog is walking the man now!"

    A few months later, angered by the ferocious dog's daily provocative barks, Mr B hung a placard on a tree near the stream with the words "Plot to kill the Dog". It's anybody's guess whether the dog understood the words on the placard, but one day when Mr B was bathing in the stream, his shirt which he had left together with his pants and other belongings on the bank disappeared mysteriously.

    When Mr B saw Mr A on the opposite bank next day, he blamed the ferocious dog for stealing the shirt. Mr A replied: "Before making any conclusions there has to be a full accounting of the facts and foundation. I shall handle the matter in accordance with the facts. I oppose all forms of stealing but there is no proof that my pet is responsible for stealing your shirt."

    Broadening his wicked smile into a toothless grin, Mr B said: "If your pet has not stolen my shirt, you must be behind the theft."

    Mr A replied angrily: "Don't insult my intelligence! Use your brain, okay? If I want to put you in an embarrassing situation, I could have taken away your pants or something more valuable instead. Please be reminded that there are many monkeys from other places fooling around in this area."

    Mr B said: "On second thought, your dog is not as agile as you or a monkey to steal my shirt which I placed together with my pants and other belongings on the bank while I was bathing. It might have hired a monkey for the mischief."

    Mr A retorted: "Find out how much it has paid the monkey."

    Back home, Mr B told his servant: "We are not idiots. We can no longer let him remain an idle bystander in our constant conflict with the dog. Henceforth, we have to drag him into the conflict in order to pressure him to control his pet."

    Seeing no action from Mr A to control his ferocious pet after many months, Mr B mixed chunks of meat with some chemicals and threw them across the stream. When the greedy dog saw the meat on the ground, it just chewed and swallowed every chunk without hesitation. After a while, the dog wriggled on the ground with terrible pain in its stomach. Mr B laughed loudly on the opposite bank: "I have sought help from your master to put an end to all your destructive and provocative actions."

    After the dog ran away towards its master's house, Mr B's servant asked: "Has Mr A agreed to rein in his ferocious pet?" Mr B replied: "No matter how desperately it may howl, it is nothing but howl of a toothless hound. I am applying a two-prong strategy to drag Mr A into the conflict, while driving a wedge between him and his mischievous pet. Mr A will end up as the real loser in the conflict."

    It's anybody's guess whether the dog understood what Mr B was saying. However, after reaching its master's house, it kept barking at him for several hours!
     
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