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Who am I

Discussion in 'Political Humor' started by Pandora, Jul 24, 2009.

  1. Pandora

    Pandora Well-Known Member

    Apr 6, 2008
    Likes Received:
    The people's republic of Eugene
    O.K. some of you are going to hate this but oh well, this is the joke section

    I would have put it someplace else If I would have bothered to take the time to fact check everything, but since I am unsure how accurate everything is, I consider it a joke.

    Who Am I?

    I was born in one country, raised in another. My father was born in
    another country. I was not his only child. He fathered several children
    with numerous women.

    I became very close to my mother, as my father showed no interest in me.
    My mother died at an early age from cancer.

    Later in life, questions arose over my real name..
    My birth records were sketchy and no one was able to produce a
    legitimate, reliable birth certificate.

    I grew up practicing one faith but converted to Christianity, as it was
    widely accepted in my country, but I practiced non-traditional beliefs &
    didn't follow Christianity, except in the public eye under scrutiny.
    I worked and lived among lower-class people as a young adult, disguising
    myself as someone who really cared about them.

    That was before I decided it was time to get serious about my life and I
    embarked on a new career.
    I wrote a book about my struggles growing up. It was clear to those who
    read my memoirs that I had difficulties accepting that my father
    abandoned me as a child.

    I became active in local politics in my 30's then with help behind the
    scenes, I literally burst onto the scene as a candidate for national
    office in my 40s. They said I had a golden tongue and could talk anyone
    into anything. That reinforced my conceit.
    I had a virtually non-existent resume, little work history, and no
    experience in leading a single organization. Yet I was a powerful speaker
    and citizens were drawn to me as though I were a magnet and they were
    small roofing tacks.

    I drew incredibly large crowds during my public appearances. This
    bolstered my ego.At first, my political campaign focused on my country's foreign policy. I
    was very critical of my country in the last war and seized every
    opportunity to bash my country.

    But what launched my rise to national prominence were my views on the
    country's economy. I pretended to have a really good plan on how we
    could do better and every poor person would be fed & housed for free.
    I knew which group was responsible for getting us into this mess. It was
    the free market, banks & corporations. I decided to start making
    citizens hate them and if they were envious of others who did well, the
    plan was clinched tight.
    I called mine "A People's Campaign" and that sounded good to all people.
    I was the surprise candidate because I emerged from outside the
    traditional path of politics & was able to gain widespread popular

    I knew that, if I merely offered the people 'hope' , together we could
    change our country and the world.
    So, I started to make my speeches sound like they were on behalf of the
    downtrodden, poor, ignorant to include "persecuted minorities" like the
    Jews. My true views were not widely known and I needed to keep them
    unknown, until after I became my nation's leader.

    I had to carefully guard reality, as anybody could have easily found out
    what I really believed, if they had simply read my writings and examined
    those people I associated with.
    I'm glad they didn't.

    I became the most powerful man in the world.

    And the world learned the truth.

    Who am I?


  2. Pandora

    Pandora Well-Known Member

    Apr 6, 2008
    Likes Received:
    The people's republic of Eugene
    For the silly person who left me a negative rep point for this thread saying

    “Ever consider relocating since you don't like your country?”

    You should know, I do not live in Germany... I live in the Greatest Nation on Gods green earth... The United States of America

    or perhaps you saw some American leader in the story of Hitler?? ... I wonder who came to your mind??

    How you thought I was bashing my country by anything I said is beyond me.
    But nope, my country is the greatest country on planet earth and I will live free or die trying here on American soil.
    1 person likes this.

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