Gay marriage: Arguments Against it, and for it.

[Phenom]

Ask just about anyone. They'll all tell you they're in favor of equal rights for homosexuals. Just name the situation, and ask. They'll all say, yes, gays should have the same rights in housing, jobs, public accomodations, and should have equal access to government benefits, equal protection of the law, etcetera, etcetera.

Then you get to gay marriage.

And that's when all this talk of equality stops dead cold.

More than half of all people in the United States oppose gay marriage, even though three fourths are otherwise supportive of gay rights. This means that many of the same people who are even passionately in favor of gay rights oppose gays on this one issue.

Why all the passion?

It's because there is a lot of misunderstanding about what homosexuality really is, as well as the erroneous assumption that gay people enjoy the same civil rights protections as everyone else. There are also a lot of stereotypes about gay relationships, and even a great deal of misunderstanding of what marriage itself is all about and what its purpose is.

The purpose of this essay, then, is to clear up a few of these misunderstandings and discuss some of facts surrounding gay relationships and marriage, gay and straight.

First, let's discuss what gay relationships are really all about. The stereotype has it that gays are promiscuous, unable to form lasting relationships, and the relationships that do form are shallow and uncommitted. And gays do have such relationships!

But the important fact to note is that just like in straight society, where such relationships also exist, they are a small minority, and exist primarily among the very young. Indeed, one of the most frequent complaints of older gay men is that it is almost impossible to find quality single men to get into a relationship with, because they're already all 'taken!'

If you attend any gay event, such as a Pride festival or a PFLAG convention, you'll find this to be true. As gays age and mature, just like their straight cohorts, they begin to appreciate and find their way into long-term committed relationships.

The values that such gay couples exhibit in their daily lives are often indistinguishable from those of their straight neighbors. They're loyal to their mates, are monogamous, devoted partners. They value and participate in family life, are committed to making their neighborhoods and communities safer and better places to live, and honor and abide by the law. Many make valuable contributions to their communities, serving on school boards, volunteering in community charities, and trying to be good citizens. In doing so, they take full advantage of their relationship to make not only their own lives better, but those of their neighbors as well.

 

[Phenom]

Gay Marriage, I believe is unacceptable in an open society.

Marriage should be between a man and a wife, solely because man and a wife play a different role in a child's life. While mother plays the role of a nurturer, the father, when older plays the role of a role model and a friend.

It is obvious that two men raising the child is not as adequate as a man and a woman raising that child. No matter how feminine one of the male may be, men all share one trait that is always there, promiscuouity. Why? because men can impregnate many while women can only do it once.

 

[curefiend]

Gay Marriage should legal, it is a question of culture. In a multi-cultural society, a individuals own personal cultural philosophy shouldn't be forced on any one else. There is no emperical way of proving that a straight couple can raise a kid better than a gay couple, as we all know, that some gay couples can probably raise kids better than straight couples can we not? Its a matter of personal character of the parents themselves. You can't make blanket statements about a certain group of people and assume what the general outcome will be. Would you perfer kids to have no parents at all (foster kids that cannot be adopted by a loving gay couple)? If anyone believes that a child is better off in a foster home than being raised by a possibly loving gay couple, then it is clear that it is not the well-being of the child that they truly care about and it is more about their own personal bigotry towards homosexuals.

 

[Phenom]

so curefield,

you believe gay marriage is okai in an open society?

should these people freely express their homosexuality in front of children?

 

[curefiend]

I do believe gay marriage is okay in a open society...I think I narrated that pretty clearly in my initial post.

And in what sense do you mean express their homosexuality in front of children? Hold hands? I don't see why not.
If you are speaking of something sexually explicit, I don't think any one should be allowed to express themselves that way in front of children....
The same cultural expectations are still in tact, I would expect any couple of any sexual orientation to behave in an appropriate manner in public spaces. So I am not sure as to what you are suggesting.

 

[Phenom]

I see. I get your point. Even though I disagree with you, I appreciate your opinion.

 

[bcellboy]

there's nothing wrong with gay marriage

I firmly support gay marriage. If two people love each other and want to commit themselves to each other, then they should be allowed to marry. Marriage is just a ceremony of two people entering a legally-binding contract. The primary reason people oppose gay marriage is their judeochristian beliefs.

As far as children go, I would much rather childrend grow up with a homosexual couple in a healthy, happy relationship than in a home where the husband abuses the wife or vice versa.

 

[curefiend]

If you dig deeper into my personal philosophy of marriage, I would suggest marriage being completely unrecognized by the state at all. What two people do is none of the states business, and certain lifestyles based off of personal choice shouldn't be promoted by the state. Why should singles or people that chose to live a life of a bachelor not receive the same financial benefits that the state offers married individuals?

Marriage, as those religiously inclined always suggest, is something spiritual, the definition of marriage should be left up to the church...not the state. There will be churches that recognized gay marriages, there will be those that do not. But it certainly not the states position to dictate the church's opinion on such trivial matters.

 

[samsara15]

Why should one have to provide any argument at all to give people basic human rights? Only as a legal contract should the state have any say in it at all. If the churches don't like it, let them do what they will. Gay people and those who wish can establish their own churches.

 

[DrFelch]

Not proven so.

Gay Marriage, I believe is unacceptable in an open society.

Marriage should be between a man and a wife, solely because man and a wife play a different role in a child's life. While mother plays the role of a nurturer, the father, when older plays the role of a role model and a friend.

It is obvious that two men raising the child is not as adequate as a man and a woman raising that child. No matter how feminine one of the male may be, men all share one trait that is always there, promiscuouity. Why? because men can impregnate many while women can only do it once.

Geez, Phenom, That is kind of a right wing talking point, whether you realize it or not. All research done on this issue has indicated otherwise, specifically, that there is no trend toward disfunction or mental illness, or any other negative effect associated with the children of same sex couples, measured against their opposite sex couple parented counterparts. It is all very well and good to "believe" things based on your instincts, ( our president does it all the time, and just LOOK how well things are turning out!) But we as a country are better off if these decisions are informed by science and fact, instead of predjudice and red herrings.

 

[USMC the Almighty]

I support civil unions for gays -- that is, so they can enjoy all the rights of a married couple, but marriage? Hell no. It is absolutely ridiculous for the government to tell churches who they can and cannot marry. And since homosexuality is outlawed in virtually every religion, you'll have a tough time finding a church to marry to gays.

As for their culture, well candidly, I find it disgusting and unnatural. People weren't supposed to be gay. If everyone was gay then civilization would die out.

 

[MarkVI]

I feel the same way, USMC the Almighty.

Marriage is a religious ceremony, but a civil union gives the couples the rights they deserve.

Just because someone is gay doesn't mean they shouldn't have the same rights as everyone else. If I don't agree with someone's lifestyle, what is it to me?

 

[USMC the Almighty]

I feel the same way, USMC the Almighty.

Marriage is a religious ceremony, but a civil union gives the couples the rights they deserve.

Just because someone is gay doesn't mean they shouldn't have the same rights as everyone else. If I don't agree with someone's lifestyle, what is it to me?

You're right. I don't care about what gays do in the bedroom and hey, if they're dedicated to living their lives together, then who am I to say they can't? I might find their actions disgusting, but they are still Americans and deserve the unalienable rights outlined in our founding documents.

 

[Walter]

I couldn't care less about gay marriages.

I think our country should focus on more important issues.

 

[USMC the Almighty]

I couldn't care less about gay marriages.

I think our country should focus on more important issues.

Agreed. But I still have an opinion on this issue, however trivial it might be.